Wedding

June is often thought of as the wedding month. Love vows are made and the journey of loving, compromising, adjusting, sharing, disagreeing, disappointing, renewing begins for two people. But it isn’t only people who wed. There are so many ways to wed things together especially if we desire love to be in the equation. When opposites are wedded, something profound takes place. Take anger, the emotion that speaks loudly about what is felt to be wrong as an example. Wed it with the nevertheless of willingness to find a solution and something mighty has happened.

Phrases Posted on Facebook, June 2019

Have you noticed that when you wed salt with something sweet in cooking, it is often delicious? In Swedish cooking that combo is often used. So, too, in life when kindness is wedded to a good dollop of toughness, something solid and sweet emerges that feels trustworthy.
In Chinese medicine the organs are said to carry a positive energetic aspect and a negative one. The kidneys, for instance, are known as the place in our bodies where we humans store fear. But with the positive spiritual energy of perseverance the organ is supported and neutralized.
The wedding of two things that seem at first unlikely become what some call mash-ups. They are something new. When we genuinely bring love to something unlovable in ourselves or unlovable in others, it is divine, a smash-up so full of potential that we become part of the continuing of creation.
We only become free of the burden of having caused hurt, or the ache of releasing hurt that was done to us, when forgiveness is wedded to accountability. It is a mighty combo.
Our lives are full of contradictions and combinations. I think that curiosity, based on wanting to learn, when wedded to respect makes for combinations that produce beautiful science, lyrical songs, delicious cooking and so much more.
It is when we are estranged from someone or something and ache for a resolution that we need to be wedded to inner change. Our estrangement may never be resolved with the person or the situation that has caused us such ache, but we can always work on not allowing the outer estrangement to divide us inwardly.
By giving ourselves a thorough dose of tenderness daily and also to the situation of human estrangement itself, we will find that the heart can slowly mend into acceptance. It is quiet. It takes time.
We are at the solstice. It will be light long into the evening. Yet these bright summer days are wedded to the coming of darkness. There will be a winter solstice. To really experience the inevitable weddings that make up life, we are to be inclusive and spacious . . . not living either/or, but living both/and. It might just make us homo sapiens into homo spaciens, a more inclusive, kinder species.
Who is invited to these weddings of opposites of difficulty and ease, of sorrow and joy, of fear and courage? We are! Guests at the evolving feast of life, the more we can support difference and inclusion, the more solid will our marriage to life be.
Yesterday at sunset on the beach in Martha’s Vineyard, I had the privilege of seeing a man get down on his knees to propose marriage to his ladylove, and she said yes. Everyone clapped to support the love and joy that filled the air. It was a wonderful moment. I realized again that anything that we truly wed together is a vow. What is asking for this deep commitment in our lives?
How fascinating water is, how soft and fluid. Truly accepting and loving people that stay fluid, non-defensive and constant can help dissolve the toughest of situations. Those who wed non-violence to violent situations are the heroes of some of our most intransigent human problems. May we learn from them and become living water.
When we watch the gorgeous freedom that a skilled dancer has, seeming almost to fly across space, we know that freedom has been wedded to hours of practice. Indulgence is not freedom but a kind of momentary escape. Can there be any true freedom, of whatever kind, without the backbone of discipline?
There is often an unconscious conviction we are wedded to that shapes our lives. What issue keeps cropping up no matter how much we have already worked on it? Could we think of it as an invisible marriage, something that partners us and needs acceptance in order for us to be whole? Could it be a life task of love?