We are always, always choosing even when we think we are not, for that, too, is a choice.
In making an important decision I like to be aware of whether my mind is making the choice or if my heart is doing so. The mind likes to be clever and “with it”. My heart wants to be “with” the situation, with others who are involved and with the choices that could make things better.
Phrases posted on Facebook, Oct. 2024
It’s hard to understand how dwelling on something negatively in a persistent way will often bring about its reality in our experience. Dwelling negatively on something is a pattern of small continuous mind choices. They add up and do great damage. Why not grab those mini mind choices by the little hairs and stop the downward slide?
This is how Stephen Levine, one of my wonderful teachers, described the fickleness of the mind. “You are at the ice cream parlor. Your mind tells you to get a double ice cream scoop (why not even three scoops with sprinkles.?) You get it and eat the whole thing, even the cone. Then the mind turns around with authority and says, ‘I wouldn’t have done that if I were you.’” The heart isn’t fickle. When the mind is ruled by the heart we are more likely to choose what is right in the moment.
Before I became an American citizen, I was adopted as a Native American. In the initiation ceremony Red Chief Tomahawk looked me in the eye for a long time and said, “Serve Life.”
Then he gave me my Indian name, Nippe, Algonquin for Clear Water. Ever since when I am confused by choices, I see him in his full regalia and hear him say, “Serve Life.” It seems always to turn out to be the better choice.
Here is a Zen paradox regarding discernment. A customer comes to the butcher who happens also to be a Zen master. The customer asks for the best piece of meat. The butcher smiles and replies that every piece of meat is the best piece of meat. That’s a big help that leaves me dangling. Can every circumstance be nourishing depending on how we look at it and discern its value? I’ve thought about this story whenever I found myself in something I didn’t desire.
Mistakes and failures are necessary. How else can I learn essential things? Perhaps every “no” is a chance to stop and to reorient. Reorienting is about discernment, isn’t it? Even if the “no” turns out to be something I must live with permanently, it opens something of value that somehow belongs to my life’s unfoldment.
Following up on my last post, it occurred to me that discernment and acceptance are deeply linked. What is, simply “is”. Without first accepting (I don’t mean approving of) the truth of any situation, how can I sort myself out in response to it? Resistance keeps things in place while acceptance makes space for something new to emerge.
What if we could choose a quality that we want to emulate? Like you, I am inspired by the presence of someone who is authentic, someone who has that “something” songs are sung about. It isn’t primarily what they are able to do, but the inner quality they transmit. We can’t help but be inspired by qualities that touch us deeply. To realize one such quality as a longing of our soul is a gift. Taking it to heart, we have a chance to slowly become what our essence longs for.
Have you ever chosen to act on something that presented itself like a whim or perhaps a little deeper than a whim? I mean the sort of nudge that you didn’t agonize over but spontaneously went ahead and followed where it seemed to be leading you. For me that is jumping out of the same old, and it makes me wonder if a guiding angel has given me a little
shove to experience life more fully.
We will soon be choosing our next president. It is a momentous time, and I am sure many of us are anxious about the results. I, for one, will take my right to vote very seriously and feel sure most of you are doing the very same thing.
Whenever we choose something heartfelt a process begins. Usually, challenges show up that somehow belong to the choice. If we stay the course, it is a sign that we are on course. Every heartfelt choice will mark us with its beauty and its cost.
When I pick even one little choice such as what I’ll make for breakfast, I see how much of that choice is made without knowing fully why I am making it . . . my appetite, what’s available in the frig, what I think is good for me, what’s going bad if I don’t use it, what I most like, etc. Thankfully we can make choices without knowing why or we would be unable to make them because accounting for everything would take too long. I have noticed that the choices I make with a kind of gut knowing are almost always better than the one I mentally struggle with. My body is often wiser than my mind. What about you?
Choosing to be grateful makes me great-full (I love my Swedish mother’s spelling of the English word). Gratefulness is always a great choice.
