The year is coming to an end in less than thirty days. No doubt enormous changes lie ahead for us. How to live now, I wonder and turn to regarding habits that serve in good times and in bad times. Habits that Serve is my subject for December.
Phrases Posted on Facebook, December 2024
Do you know the heart-friendly habit of having a lope? It’s a walk you take often, somewhere near where you live. It’s a little bit like when a dog runs to familiar places and marks its territory. Such a walk is not only good for the body, but it helps us slowly become part of a place, all its seasons and moods. We grow to know it, and in the process, we are also known.
In making my daily” to do” lists I have come to making them short, no more than four items, and the one I will absolutely promise myself to not shirk is starred. Not doing what I intend lowers the life force in me. Keeping a self-promise strengthens the life force. Do the doable I tell myself. It serves me well.
The brain has three parts. The oldest is the so-called reptilian brain. That part of us is always looking out for what is wrong and still does. It may wake us up at night. But It is reassured by order and calms down when some ordering happens. Energy is released to other parts of the brain. Whenever we feel anxious, that is when to clean up a closet, a drawer, or a pocketbook. Creating order really helps.
Creating order is different from having a rule. The Benedictines have a rule, meaning a railing to hold onto as they live their commitment. They have set times of prayer and work. A rule is a way to embrace a way of life. Coming to one’s own livable rule is a great thing, a stabilizing habit. I have a more or less steady habit of taking moments of silence in a day. It’s a space for spaciousness, a return to essentials and a deep refreshment.
Many of us have a habit of tensing up to be ready to do whatever we need to do whether it is carpooling, difficult phone calls or shoveling snow. It is a helpful habit to exhale deeply, relax the body and smile before we go about whatever is at hand to do. A writing friend of mine does this whenever he turns on the computer. He says it’s like a little prayer asking for help with his work.
December is one of the busiest months of the year. I’m shaking my head and telling myself that no one, especially not me, is going to pursue all the habits I am writing about. WHEW!
Taking up just one that appeals is good enough because when it really is a habit one just does it as part of one’s nature and the benefit can be felt.
Here’s a helpful habit we all can use. The moment the temptation comes to join in gossip, criticism or giving someone a piece of our minds, it’s good to put the invisible Velcro on our lips for 30 seconds at least. It’s a chance to come off automatic pilot and restore choices and our own dignity.
I love random acts of blessing. It makes the day seem to sparkle when, unbidden, a blessing is spontaneously sent to someone I see whom I don’t know. This can be done for parts of nature, animals and just about for anything. It reminds me that life itself is a blessing in which I live, and which supports me.
When things are dark and turbulent in the world, that energy can spin us into despair. But we can make a habit of deep breathing, one hand on the heart another on our belly button.
A few minutes like that is a silent, daily commitment to center, trust and be present. It is the NEVERTHELESS that can sustain us in tough times. And it can bring us back again and again to the love hidden in us and around us.
The holidays are times in which we remember one another and wish each other well. The letters, calls and gifts flow. What if this coming year is a year in which we continue the holiday habit and remember to tell our love often to those who matter to us. We know what goes around comes around and re-membering. I mean re- uniting with those that love often and do so extravagantly.
It’s the Solstice time and the darkest of days will change little by little. It’s a time for hoping. For me, cultivating hope is a habit I want to embrace more especially as things seem more dire in the world of late. Here is a quote that’s worthy of attention by Steven Charleston in his Ladder to Light: An Indigenous Elder’s Meditations on Hope and Courage: “Sometimes, in this troubled world of ours, we forget that love is all around us. We imagine the worst of other people and withdraw into our own shells. But try this simple test: Stand still in any crowded placer and watch the people around you. Within a very short time, you will begin to see love, and you see it over and over and over. A young mother talking to her child, a couple laughing together as they walk by, an old man holding the door for a stranger – small signs of love are everywhere. The more you look, the more you will see. Love is literally everywhere. We are surround by love.”
Christmas and Hanukkah are almost here. Whatever ways we celebrate them and the other holidays of this season, light will be a theme and something we to turn to. I love that the word light in English is both the word for illumination and the word for less weightiness. To lighten up is then something wonderful we can do and make a habit of in the holidays and in the year to come. To lighten our being can never be a mistake. We give it as a gift to everyone.
December 26, Boxing Day and Christmas have passed. We’re in the days of Hanukkah. We humans have a need to celebrate, don’t we? I think it is a need to affirm life no matter what, a habit that must somehow be built into us unless we have squashed it in ourselves or others have squashed it in us. One joyful, even mini moment of celebration can change the course of things. Let’s lift our hearts and say, “YES”.
A once-in-awhile habit is to forage in closets or cupboards to pick a few good things to give away just because it’s possible. The room we make is a space for new good to arrive that may not be in the form of an object. Sharing good brings about more good for us and for others. It is a round-trip ticket.
The new year is drawing to a close and many troubling changes may soon be upon us in 2025. I take heart and refuge in the essential goodness that is in and all around us. For me this is a time to realize the truth that goodness is everywhere present even when things are tough.
In Swedish we say Gott Nytt Ar, that is, Good New Year, not Happy New Year. I like that because in re-new-ing our connection to goodness we can’t help but experience more goodness. What we focus on grows. A blessed 2025 to everyone.
